Unless you have been living under a rock these past few weeks, you would know the name Cody Parkey. He is the Bears kicker that missed a game-winning field goal as time ticked down, ending the Bears historic season.
People have expressed themselves in different ways, some with anger:
You could say Chicago isn’t too happy with Cody Parkey right now @barstoolchicago pic.twitter.com/6wGOGn0dJU
— Barstool Sports (@barstoolsports) January 7, 2019
Others with empathy:
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.@kobebryant and @DwyaneWade had some words of encouragement for Cody Parkey after he missed the potential game-winning field goal last night. pic.twitter.com/aWmBylujWO
— ESPN (@espn) January 7, 2019
I personally started out in a state of shock, which then turned to anger, which then went back to shock. After a few nights to ponder over this, I decided to express my feelings through poetry (I am aware I wreak of class). So without further ado, here it is:
“An Ode to Cody Parkey”
The Bears searched far and wide for a guy that could get us three.
And for 15 million dollars, they went with Cody Parkey
He showed real promise in Philly, and as a ‘Fin
The Bears were really confident that they can turn to him to seal a win
But the doinks became standard, as you did it 8 times
And the Bears fans would cringe when they would hear that familiar chime
The day was January 6th, and the lights were shined bright
All of Chicago was beyond ready for their team to win the fight
The wind was mild, the grass was green
But all of Chicago was thinking how you hit more rails this year than Charlie Sheen
With a chance to once and for all silence the chants of “Fly Eagles Fly”
What we got was a double doink, one that made all of Chicago die
He missed it! He missed it! Everyone was silent and in shock
Silence turned to outrage, and tomorrow’s headline was already reading “Parkey Death by a Glock”
Now the season is over, ending in blood, sweat, and tears
And today we sound like a Cubs fans saying “Well there’s always next year”
So now we enter the offseason, one where we want the front office to make moves that are bold
But the first order of business should be to bring back Robbie fucking Gould!
