I have been staring at my screen for about 10 minutes now trying to figure out a knee slapper of an opening line for this blog. Nothing is registering in my head, so if I can’t figure out one soon, you fine readers are stuck with this. My bad, I’ll be better next time.

Dissecting this film, I first thought this was just a YMCA that Michael popped into and decided to play some ball. Maybe you older readers can help me out because this was before my time, but did they just not give a fuck about wearing uniforms during the summer? They have “AJ” written on the shirts so maybe it was some sort of charity event. Either way, seeing prime time Michael soar through the air throwing down dunks will never get old.

This video, in my opinion, is the epitome of Michael. The man didn’t care if it was a summer league game or Game 6 of the NBA Finals, he is going 100% Charlie’s Angels Full Throttle. Once he stepped on to the court, he was looking to rip your heart out and give it back to your ex-girlfriend, smiling the entire way. He didn’t care if you were Magic Johnson or the local pastor, he was going to windmill his nuts on your face if that meant giving his team a better chance to win the game.

Image result for michael shrug gif

TixBlitz - Instantly buy BULLS TICKETS and save using promo code "mockery."

We have tirelessly heard the debate on who is the best to ever play the game, and these days it is between LeBron and MJ. The argument always gets steered into this narrative at some point. We are watching LeBron in the midst of yet another turmoil-filled season, and now he is having a reduction in his minutes for the rest of the year. Michael was playing 40+ minutes a night while on the WIZARDS. There was no such thing as an off button, or okay let’s chill for a little bit period.

So if any of you need some new material in this debate, here you go.

Related image

Now all Michael has to do is give us Kemba Walker this offseason, he owes that much to the Chicago fan base. Just steer him in the right direction, let him know how awesome our fan base is. Let him know how great it is bringing home a title to this great sports town. I mean the man hasn’t brought us a championship in 20 years, it’s the least he can do.